It wasn't long until I felt the heat of the melting pot once again, as I was reminded of how others scrutinized our actions as Christians, so I went to the Word of God for direction. The Holy Spirit leading me to 1 Timothy and began to read, I was stopped at 4:12, “Be an example to the believer in word, in conduct, in love, in spirit, in faith, in purity.” (NKJV). A word search on conduct
, did you know these two words are related to the word conversation? God gave us His written Word as a blueprint for living, stating in James 1:22 we are told to be doers of His word and not just hears only for when we do, we deceive ourselves. Verse 26 (NKJV) states, “If anyone amount among you thinks he is religious, and does not bridle his tongue but deceived his own heart, this one’s religion is useless.” An empty religion will betray itself in the way we present ourselves to others. They will not be easily fooled by religious sounding words and a self-righteous lifestyle; we must live the life we are professing. Oftentimes, we are unaware of how our actions reflect the Jesus in us. A sister in the Lord hurt me deeply. Everything within me wanted to retaliate, but instead, I asked for her forgiveness openly and reached out to her in love. Was it easy? No. Everything in me was crying out for justice, but I knew that wasn’t the answer, so everyday I stood on this scripture, “Creat in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit with in me. Do not cast me away from Your presence, and do not take Your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of Your salvation, and uphold me by Your generous a Spirit” (Psalm 51:10-12, NKJV).
Weeks pasted and I tried to put into practice all that the Lord had been showing me and standing on the Word, but something wasn’t but something just wasn’t right. Then one morning during devotions, I was reading in the book of Acts when the Lord ,once again, spoke to my heart, “. . . Your heart is not right in the sight ifGod. Repent therefore of this your wickedness, and pray God if perhaps the thought of your heart may be forgiven you.” (Acts 8: 21-22, NKJV). I sat there silently for sometime, but on the inside I was arguing with myself to admit what I knew in my heart was true. You see, you can’t fool God, He knew I had been operating out of head knowledge and not heart knowledge. That was a hard reality to face, but I knew I had to ask God to forgiveness and allow Him to once again skim the dross from my heart.
As time pasted, I tried to put into practice all that God had be showing me, am I there yet, no. Sometimes it can be a long journey from the head to the heart. I had, however, learned to surrender all to the Lord. God has chosen all of us for a purpose. When we stand before Him accountable for our words, my prayer is, that when tested by fire all that remains will be gold and silver. A vessel fit for the Masters use.
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